Flying Blind: Trusting God When Nothing Makes Sense

Her name is Cindy. She’s my older sister. I don’t say big sister because she’s very petite. I’ve written about her before and I’ve written often about her and her husband Mike and their walk with God. They saw many miracles together.

Mike died suddenly and unexpectedly December 11, 2015, while they were having their morning devotions together – as they had done every morning for more than 35 years. Every morning they read the Bible together and prayed before starting their day. They owned a vibrant construction company in Oklahoma City. Mike’s passing was hard on all of us, as he was a beautiful man of God with a giant warm heart and a brilliant sense of humor. Everyone loved Mike. He was like that. Then the Lord called him Home – and in an instant, in an unchangeable moment – Mike was gone. One minute reading Scripture, the next minute in the presence of God. Mike would have been 74 on August 1, 2026.

The construction business is a male-dominated industry. Without Mike, several big jobs pulled out of their contracts and wouldn’t allow Cindy to complete the work – though she was more than capable. Cindy and Mike had sold their big home on the hill to downsize and build their dream home where they’d eventually retire. They were living in a small rental house when Mike died and all of their belongings were in storage. In one moment, Cindy went from a vibrant business woman, co-leading a company that earned $3 million a year, to a woman without a home, without a company, without a husband. In fact, the life that she’d always known and loved was gone.

Cindy closed the construction business she and Mike had started and ran together for 25 years. She purchased a small home and worked as a sales associate and eventually as an assistant manager at a high-end clothing store. She worked 8 to 10 hours a day, on her feet, serving women who sometimes didn’t treat her as they should.

She never complained. She never groaned. She remained faithful.

Not surprising, Cindy became one of the top sales associates for her district – quite a feat. Big dogs from corporate came to visit and while there, asked her the secret to her success. She explained that she served God in the store the same way she’d served God in the construction business – with excellence. She worked as unto Christ and put Him at the center of all she did. She applied a true Christian worldview of work. She loved colleagues, even the grumpy ones. She prayed for customers, even the hateful ones. She honored Christ and once again I watched in awe as my sister – a true woman of God – walked by faith.

Recently, my sister was hospitalized with a strange and undefinable stomach virus. The doctors had no idea what it was and couldn’t treat it. She was in the hospital for five days. She has a high tolerance for physical pain, a trait she inherited from our Dad. Daryl and I took the five-hour drive down to Oklahoma City as soon as we heard she was in the hospital. I stayed there with her each night. She would have done the same for me. I watched as my sister writhed in pain. She projectile vomited and experienced all that comes with a GI infection. Day after day. Night after night. I feared for her life as doctors had no idea how to treat her. Nurses were unsympathetic and my presence there was mostly as a noise maker to get someone to help her. I think Covid left many medical teams aloof and unempathetic. Every four hours my petite sister, my hero, this woman of faith, would writhe, vomit, make trips to the bathroom with an IV hook up keeping her hydrated. I’d lay hands on her; we’d pray and beg God to help her.

One early morning, the spell was so bad I thought for sure she wasn’t going to make it. Two nurses and I stood helplessly in the bathroom as fluids projected from her body. I was crying and praying in the Spirit out loud, I cried “She’s suffered enough, Lord Jesus! Please give her relief! Please heal her, Lord Jesus.” One nurse from Nigeria knew to Whom I was praying, but wouldn’t make eye contact. The other was in a state of shock. Then I heard her between the convulsions. It started out as a whisper and then became a shout, “I will trust You! I will praise You Jesus. I praise you Lord and I trust You! I will worship You in all circumstances!” My sister was praising God and thanking Him for His goodness. “You are a good God and I know You love me!”

Her husband gone. Her lifestyle completely changed. Her company gone. And now she was hospitalized with an unknown illness causing excruciating pain and what was she doing? She was praising her Savior and giving Him thanks. She was worshiping.

And for all of us watching, we knew this was a sacrifice of praise.

Believe it or not, four hours later that woman of God walked out of that hospital on her own and hasn’t had a single bout of that crazy unknown illness since. The doctor who had attended her said, “You are the best patient I have never treated.” He called it a miracle. So do I.

My sister has taught me a lot about faith, but most of all she’s taught me about faithfulness.

The last week of August, 2023, my sister traveled with Daryl and me to The Leadership Anvil’s Academics in the Alps conference. Back in January, when all the planning was coming together for this conference, Daryl had a very specific vision. What if we had an academic conference that included spouses and children? What if it was a time of refreshing and learning, not just for the Christian professors serving in their universities around Europe, but what if wives, and mommies, and kids were ministered to as well? He called my sister Cindy and asked her, “Can you join us? There’s no one better equipped to lead sessions for the women than you. We don’t know exactly what it will look like, but can you be a part of what we are doing?”

With her usual humble and gentle spirit, she accepted Daryl’s invitation. And WOW! Did God ever use her. Cindy did a devotional time with the women and mommies each morning. They bonded, learned prayer strategies for their families, confided in one another, and most importantly, they prayed for each other. She brought a message from God’s Word that wasn’t just theory – but it was a tried-and-true principle. They listened, because she was a woman whose faith had been tried by fire. Her faith is like Job, or the three Hebrew children in the fiery furnace, or even Joseph, “You meant it for evil, but God turned it for good.”

It was such a beautiful thing to behold as my sister rose from the ashes and ministered to women who often felt unheard and unseen; to watch as God the Father turned her mourning into joy. Faithfulness is a virtue and of all the people I’ve known in my life, I’ve never seen anyone more faithful to God in the worst of circumstances than my sister Cindy.

Cindy lost everything – her beloved Mike, her home, her company, her prestige, her affluence – but she didn’t lose her way. She stood faithful trusting God and believing Romans 8:28, “All things work to the good of them that love God and called according to His purposes.” She’s now starting a new chapter in her life and though it hasn’t been easy, she’s persevered.

There are three important lessons I’ve learned from my faithful and beautiful sister Cindy.

First, she never stopped her daily devotional times with God. Every single day she gets up and starts her day reading God’s Word, praying, and worshiping. Never misses.

Secondly, our words have power. She never complained, moaned, or spoke unkind thoughts. She kept a guard on her lips and the Lord blessed her for that.

And the third lesson: fly blind. When Daryl was getting his instrument rating for flying one of the tests required that he fly blind. They put a hood on him and he could not see outside the plane – his flying had to be solely from the instrument panel. He could only watch the instruments. With the hood he might feel as if he was going downward, but the instrument panel told him he was straight with the horizon. He might feel he was going to the left or the right, but he had to trust the instrument panel and not be moved by what he felt, but trust what the instruments were telling him. Flying blind. That’s what my sister has been doing for the last ten years. She’s not been living by what she feels or what her circumstances say to her or what others tell her – she’s been living by faith in the Word of God, which in life is our instrument panel. She trusted God even when her circumstances shouted otherwise. She loved Jesus not because of what she was going through, but in spite of it. “I will trust You Jesus! No matter what!” And for all of us watching, it was a beautiful thing to behold.

Why do bad things happen to good people? I don’t know, but I have learned from my sister Cindy that faith is purified by fire and hers is pure gold. Peace.

— Teri

Cindy and Mike in 2013